Apparently some crazy people are upset that in the animal kingdom, wild beasts don't necessarily adhere to the "father-mother-children" dynamic and because of this, a kids' story book about a family of penguins with two fathers is at the top of a STUPID list of library books that "the public" objects to the most. The details according to yahoo.com state that "And Tango Makes Three," was released in 2005 and co-written by Justin Richardson and Peter Parnell.
Pretty much since the day it appreared on Barnes & Noble shelves is has been the most "challenged" book in public schools and libraries for the second straight year, according to the American Library Association. Here is the head idiot trying to defend why a children's book is at the top of that list: "The complaints are that young children will believe that homosexuality is a lifestyle that is acceptable. The people complaining, of course, don't agree with that," Judith Krug, director of the ALA's Office for Intellectual Freedom, told The Associated Press on Tuesday.
So a bunch of homophobes doesn't like that in Antarctica, SOMETIMES PENGUINS HAVE TWO FATHERS! It isn't like the penguins go off and do it. No they just raise the baby penguins.
The ALA defines a "challenge" as a "formal, written complaint filed with a library or school requesting that materials be removed because of content or appropriateness."
Other books on the ALA's top 10 list include Maya Angelou's memoir "I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings," Mark Twain's "The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn," long and Philip Pullman's "The Golden Compass."
No word on if the ALA Challengers are going back and attacking the script of the popular show My Two Dads, or the movie Three Men and a Baby or even Three Men and a Little Lady. Or the movie Father's Day featuring Billy Crystal and Robin Williams and NEITHER of those two turned out to be the father, instead it was another guy. The question if I was the kid in that movie, "Mom, were you such a slut that you didn't know if you slept with the guy from Flubber or the guy from City Slickers, or the cop from Usual Suspects that TURNED out to be Dad?"
Are the ALA challengers going after those scripts? Because those are WORSE that penguins that raise Baby Happy Feet together.
All I am saying.
Get a grip you jerks. Quit trying to be everyone's parents and let the parents do their own jobs. Thanks.
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
Huddy's a rock star, but give Smoltzie the ball
The Braves won their 5th straight tonight with a 5-2 win over the Pod-squad and tomorrow the team looks to sweep its second straight series. Jo-Jo the monkey boy will take the hill against an 0-3 Justin Germano. The Braves will prolly win 5-1 if this trend holds up. Also, Greg Norton got his first hit and RBI as a Brave. Way to come through and Chipper continues to dazzle. Why are teams still pitching to him? If I am the Pirates Friday, I walk him 5 straight times and hope he gets out of his rhythm for the rest of the series. Do SOMETHING. And hey Tex, you left a few on base tonight. You maybe should have worked on that in spring training. Finally, Matt Diaz, I know you play hard, but I hope Kotsay is manning left next season. Sorry Matty.
In tonight's show we raised an interesting thought though and I wanted to share here. When Smoltz comes back, he has said he is headed to the bullpen and at 40, soon to be 41 he doesn't have much time left and he thinks the pen can save his arm for now.
And with Smoltzie in the pen, in about a month, or at least by the all-star break, the Braves bullpen should be backended by Smoltz, Soriano and Gonzalez. NICE. With a rotation of
1Huddy
2Glavine
3Jurrjens
4Reyes
5James/Bennett/Carlyle
come the postseason, the rotation, assuming no trades for a guy like Joe Blanton go down, will be
1Huddy
2Glavine
3Jurrjens
You don't really need a 4th starter in the LDS, MAYBE in the LCS, but come World Series time, you get by with the three pitchers. STEP UP IT'S WORLD SERIES TIME
I see in the postseason Huddy giving you 7-8 innings (look at his numbers. He just picked up his 5th win of the year and he has GREAT stuff that can last into late innings. Glavine gives you 5-6 and Jurrjens gives you 6-7 innings. With Gonzo and Soriano and Smoltz in the pen, rotating who saves the game, you have several wins BUILT IN.
But here is my point....In a game seven, does John Smoltz look at his 41yo body and say, "I only have MAYBE 2 more years if COMPLETELY healthy. How many more titles will I have a shot at?" I am banking he walks into Bobby's office and DEMANDS the ball.
They would even keep it all quiet. You would watch Huddy warming up in the pen, then all of a sudden, after the outfield is announced position by position, same with the infield, you hear AC/DC and JOHN SMOLTZ walks out of the dugout and Turner Field GOES NUTS. He pitches until the 6th or 7th when, after 120 pitches, his arm literally gives out, but ONLY after hurling one final 96MPH fastball to strike out the final hitter. Maybe you can even hear the arm go. But as he walks off, arm dangling at his side, he tips his cap, stands at the top of the dugout steps, gets a standing O, not just from the crowd, but also the team....NO WAY the team loses. Maybe he ends his career, but I am guessing the Bulldog Smoltz would TOTALLY go out like that. So what if his arm is messed up? He gets another ring! Kevin McHale walks with a limp because he played with a broken foot. Curt Schilling stapled his tendon to his anklebone. The bloody sock is in Cooperstown. (Though I will argue that the sock is now overblown. True it inspired the team, BUT it didn't end Schill's career. He just got a new contract before the year started. Though he is now hurt, but not his leg. Kind of takes a little away. If he had never pitched again, WOW.)
I am guessing Smoltz WOULD take the trade and he would go down in history as a HUGE gamer, not that he won't but that clip would be shown forever.
Smoltz doesn't have that much left, why not go out like that. Hollywood right there, but if the situation came up, I wouldn't be shocked if it didn't just play out.
In tonight's show we raised an interesting thought though and I wanted to share here. When Smoltz comes back, he has said he is headed to the bullpen and at 40, soon to be 41 he doesn't have much time left and he thinks the pen can save his arm for now.
And with Smoltzie in the pen, in about a month, or at least by the all-star break, the Braves bullpen should be backended by Smoltz, Soriano and Gonzalez. NICE. With a rotation of
1Huddy
2Glavine
3Jurrjens
4Reyes
5James/Bennett/Carlyle
come the postseason, the rotation, assuming no trades for a guy like Joe Blanton go down, will be
1Huddy
2Glavine
3Jurrjens
You don't really need a 4th starter in the LDS, MAYBE in the LCS, but come World Series time, you get by with the three pitchers. STEP UP IT'S WORLD SERIES TIME
I see in the postseason Huddy giving you 7-8 innings (look at his numbers. He just picked up his 5th win of the year and he has GREAT stuff that can last into late innings. Glavine gives you 5-6 and Jurrjens gives you 6-7 innings. With Gonzo and Soriano and Smoltz in the pen, rotating who saves the game, you have several wins BUILT IN.
But here is my point....In a game seven, does John Smoltz look at his 41yo body and say, "I only have MAYBE 2 more years if COMPLETELY healthy. How many more titles will I have a shot at?" I am banking he walks into Bobby's office and DEMANDS the ball.
They would even keep it all quiet. You would watch Huddy warming up in the pen, then all of a sudden, after the outfield is announced position by position, same with the infield, you hear AC/DC and JOHN SMOLTZ walks out of the dugout and Turner Field GOES NUTS. He pitches until the 6th or 7th when, after 120 pitches, his arm literally gives out, but ONLY after hurling one final 96MPH fastball to strike out the final hitter. Maybe you can even hear the arm go. But as he walks off, arm dangling at his side, he tips his cap, stands at the top of the dugout steps, gets a standing O, not just from the crowd, but also the team....NO WAY the team loses. Maybe he ends his career, but I am guessing the Bulldog Smoltz would TOTALLY go out like that. So what if his arm is messed up? He gets another ring! Kevin McHale walks with a limp because he played with a broken foot. Curt Schilling stapled his tendon to his anklebone. The bloody sock is in Cooperstown. (Though I will argue that the sock is now overblown. True it inspired the team, BUT it didn't end Schill's career. He just got a new contract before the year started. Though he is now hurt, but not his leg. Kind of takes a little away. If he had never pitched again, WOW.)
I am guessing Smoltz WOULD take the trade and he would go down in history as a HUGE gamer, not that he won't but that clip would be shown forever.
Smoltz doesn't have that much left, why not go out like that. Hollywood right there, but if the situation came up, I wouldn't be shocked if it didn't just play out.
Mid-week Entertainment report 5/7/08
J&J, another Impossible Mission and Dwight joins a Rock band.
Ladies and gentlemen, it's the mid-week entertainment report!
CLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAP
So Jen Aniston and John Mayer are dating. Wow. I know Mayer is talented. Just listen to his Continuum album (and not that first crap CD) and you can HEAR the talent. But the guy looks a little weird. So HOW in the world did he bag BOTH Jess Simpson AND Jen Aniston? I guess if you can play the guitar, you CAN get in any girl's pants. I am teaching my son to play guitar!
Tom Cruise is back as Ethan Hawke for yet ANOTHER Mission:Impossible movie. With all due respect to Tom Cruise, but the guy is what, 45? Turn over the reigns Tommy Boy. A guy that would be perfect is a younger version of yourself, like maybe someone from the first movie's age range: Colin Farrell. He starred in The Recruit and LOOKED the part of Mission:Impossible. And a few years back I wouldn't have thought he needed TC's sloppy seconds, but NOW, I think he is homeless and would JUMP at the part. Pass the baton Tom, especially if the studios are thinking a M:I5. Bring in Farrell and pass the torch.
And Rainn Wilson is set to make the leap into movies (Other than bit parts in Juno and the Jumanji3 movie) with The Rocker. Apparently his character wanted to join an 80s hairband, but he missed his chance. Now he is joining a teen emo band. While it should be funny (depending on who else is in it) Dwight needs to be careful not to typecast as a certain character. Show some range and don't just rock the one trick pony thing, because eventually it WILL dry up and people will stop watching you on The Office (though I think the Office is ultimately doomed since "Jim" is off starring in movies and Michael Scott is probably starting his final season-the guy is too funny to be stuck in TV. Then NBC will kill the show by bringing in Jon Lovitz as the new boss, and the show will go away. ONE THING NBC could do to TOTALLY Save the show when SC does leave, bring in Ricky Gervas from the British version. That could totally work. Even say he's coming in from the British office or something. It would work)
Ladies and gentlemen, it's the mid-week entertainment report!
CLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAP
So Jen Aniston and John Mayer are dating. Wow. I know Mayer is talented. Just listen to his Continuum album (and not that first crap CD) and you can HEAR the talent. But the guy looks a little weird. So HOW in the world did he bag BOTH Jess Simpson AND Jen Aniston? I guess if you can play the guitar, you CAN get in any girl's pants. I am teaching my son to play guitar!
Tom Cruise is back as Ethan Hawke for yet ANOTHER Mission:Impossible movie. With all due respect to Tom Cruise, but the guy is what, 45? Turn over the reigns Tommy Boy. A guy that would be perfect is a younger version of yourself, like maybe someone from the first movie's age range: Colin Farrell. He starred in The Recruit and LOOKED the part of Mission:Impossible. And a few years back I wouldn't have thought he needed TC's sloppy seconds, but NOW, I think he is homeless and would JUMP at the part. Pass the baton Tom, especially if the studios are thinking a M:I5. Bring in Farrell and pass the torch.
And Rainn Wilson is set to make the leap into movies (Other than bit parts in Juno and the Jumanji3 movie) with The Rocker. Apparently his character wanted to join an 80s hairband, but he missed his chance. Now he is joining a teen emo band. While it should be funny (depending on who else is in it) Dwight needs to be careful not to typecast as a certain character. Show some range and don't just rock the one trick pony thing, because eventually it WILL dry up and people will stop watching you on The Office (though I think the Office is ultimately doomed since "Jim" is off starring in movies and Michael Scott is probably starting his final season-the guy is too funny to be stuck in TV. Then NBC will kill the show by bringing in Jon Lovitz as the new boss, and the show will go away. ONE THING NBC could do to TOTALLY Save the show when SC does leave, bring in Ricky Gervas from the British version. That could totally work. Even say he's coming in from the British office or something. It would work)
A Total Team effort
With a 5-3 lead entering the 9th, the Braves went to their closer de jour (Closer of the day. Sounds GOOD. I'll have a cup) Manny Acosta. He didn't quite get the job done, in fact he had to leave with the tying run on first base and the go-ahead at the plate. Royce Ring came in, blew smoke by Adrian Gonzalez, who gave the Padres the lead in the first inning with a double. Then Jeff Bennett, in his best Oscar Villareal impression, recorded the final out. Is Bennett a starter? Long reliever? Closer? Setup man? He does it all.
Speaking of doing it all, Chipper Jones hits his 10th home run, before being walked the rest of the game and Mark Kotsay was 2-4 with 2RBI and 2 Runs, including a home run. That dude CONTINUES to impress me and he SHOULD be a part of the Braves next year, however they can swing that.
Finally, Jair Jurrjens CONTINUES to be a strong starter, and he has REALLY stepped up now that Smoltzie is hurt and headed to the pen. Huddy goes tonight and Glavine tomorrow, but you would HAVE to put Jair in the 3spot in your postseason rotation. And PS, I wouldn't mind that rotation in the postseason, especially with Smoltz, Gonza and Soriano closing out the games.
Let's just hope that Big Tex offers some help to Chipper in the near future. And PS Mark, ummmm, Dude, when they Intentionally pass someone IN FRONT OF YOU, TO LOAD THE BASES, YOU MUST MAKE THEM PAY. Not fly out to left field.
This is stuff you learn in spring training.......oops nevermind
Speaking of doing it all, Chipper Jones hits his 10th home run, before being walked the rest of the game and Mark Kotsay was 2-4 with 2RBI and 2 Runs, including a home run. That dude CONTINUES to impress me and he SHOULD be a part of the Braves next year, however they can swing that.
Finally, Jair Jurrjens CONTINUES to be a strong starter, and he has REALLY stepped up now that Smoltzie is hurt and headed to the pen. Huddy goes tonight and Glavine tomorrow, but you would HAVE to put Jair in the 3spot in your postseason rotation. And PS, I wouldn't mind that rotation in the postseason, especially with Smoltz, Gonza and Soriano closing out the games.
Let's just hope that Big Tex offers some help to Chipper in the near future. And PS Mark, ummmm, Dude, when they Intentionally pass someone IN FRONT OF YOU, TO LOAD THE BASES, YOU MUST MAKE THEM PAY. Not fly out to left field.
This is stuff you learn in spring training.......oops nevermind
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
The Worst For-You Food in America list
I disagree!
Men's Health released a list of the worst foods in America. Of course what they meant to say was worst FOR YOU foods in America.
Their #1 (or last, whatever) was....
The Worst Food in America
Outback Steakhouse Aussie Cheese Fries with Ranch Dressing
2,900 calories
182 g fat
240 g carbs
It's the caloric equivalent of eating 14 Krispy Kreme doughnuts, before your dinner arrives. Even if you split this "starter" with 3 friends, you'll have downed a meal's worth of calories
I COMPLETELY DISAGREE. I can't dispute the calories or anything, but this might be the BEST MEAL IN AMERICA! BEST. EVER. Men's Health can kiss my STILL TRIM, DESPITE EATING THIS MEAL MAYBE 50X IN MY LIFE butt! Take THAT Men's Health.
Men's Health released a list of the worst foods in America. Of course what they meant to say was worst FOR YOU foods in America.
Their #1 (or last, whatever) was....
The Worst Food in America
Outback Steakhouse Aussie Cheese Fries with Ranch Dressing
2,900 calories
182 g fat
240 g carbs
It's the caloric equivalent of eating 14 Krispy Kreme doughnuts, before your dinner arrives. Even if you split this "starter" with 3 friends, you'll have downed a meal's worth of calories
I COMPLETELY DISAGREE. I can't dispute the calories or anything, but this might be the BEST MEAL IN AMERICA! BEST. EVER. Men's Health can kiss my STILL TRIM, DESPITE EATING THIS MEAL MAYBE 50X IN MY LIFE butt! Take THAT Men's Health.
I'm Star Jones. I'm a Lawyer!
I cannot get Tracy Morgan's impression of Star Jones out of my head as I read an article on a possible romance between Dwyane [sic] Wade and Star Jones. Apparently the recently divorced 46-year old mother of two and former lawyer-turned View co-host-turned.... is "really close friends" with Dwyane [sic] Wade. Wade is of course the 26 year old star of the Miami Heat (when he isn't injured on the sidelines or off making T-Mobile and G2 commercials instead of rehabbing).
Dwyane [sic] Wade is a father of two and still married, but apparently he was recently spotted at a tennis match with Star Jones (the real one, NOT Tracy Morgan in drag) and that led to the TNT crew to ask Dwyane [sic] Wade in interviews if he and Star Jones (I'm a Lawyer!) were a couple. Dwyane [sic] denied the rumors and laughed.
Charles called Star Jones (I'm a lawyer!) a cougar preying on Dwyane [sic] and everyone laughed.
First off, I just swallowed a bit of throwup. Second, the dude is married, so let's cool it with that talk because his wife and/or kids might be watching. Third, instead of grilling him on those topics, why not ask why he CONTINUES to misspell his name? Obvie his parents were too dumb to know how to spell it, but you are old enough to learn the proper way not Dwyane [sic]!
And the last point I want to bring up...what is it with The View co-hosts having affairs? Star Jones (I'm a LAWYER!), and Barbara Walters with an old senator back in the day. WOW. WOW. I wonder if Barbara Walters feels like a hypocrite when she was interviewing and criticizing folks for extramarital affairs, KNOWING SHE DID THE SAME THING? I wonder. Hey Barb, you were THE OTHER WOMAN! Way to potentially break up a family! Good work.
Dwyane [sic] Wade is a father of two and still married, but apparently he was recently spotted at a tennis match with Star Jones (the real one, NOT Tracy Morgan in drag) and that led to the TNT crew to ask Dwyane [sic] Wade in interviews if he and Star Jones (I'm a Lawyer!) were a couple. Dwyane [sic] denied the rumors and laughed.
Charles called Star Jones (I'm a lawyer!) a cougar preying on Dwyane [sic] and everyone laughed.
First off, I just swallowed a bit of throwup. Second, the dude is married, so let's cool it with that talk because his wife and/or kids might be watching. Third, instead of grilling him on those topics, why not ask why he CONTINUES to misspell his name? Obvie his parents were too dumb to know how to spell it, but you are old enough to learn the proper way not Dwyane [sic]!
And the last point I want to bring up...what is it with The View co-hosts having affairs? Star Jones (I'm a LAWYER!), and Barbara Walters with an old senator back in the day. WOW. WOW. I wonder if Barbara Walters feels like a hypocrite when she was interviewing and criticizing folks for extramarital affairs, KNOWING SHE DID THE SAME THING? I wonder. Hey Barb, you were THE OTHER WOMAN! Way to potentially break up a family! Good work.
Monday, May 5, 2008
Was it really worth it?
A few weeks ago, I tried to lay out how the Hawks could beat the Celtics in the first round, and Atlanta was able to force a game seven. But that is where the cookie started to crumble. Boston of course blew out the Hawks in the win-or-go-home game and now Atlanta faces the off-season. The result of a Celtics series win is what 99.8% of America predicted, the Hawks going home, but I would have been interested to see the numbers right after the Hawks won game six. People MAYBE started to believe. ESPN talking heads were saying that MAYBE the Hawks COULD pull off the biggest upset in NBA Playoffs history.
Alas, it was not to be. And the worst part about getting crushed in game seven: the Hawks are right back to where everyone thought they were entering the playoffs. Yahoo.com ran a headline “See how bad the Celtics beat Atlanta in Game 7.” ABC’s Jeff Van Gundy said that this blowout loss erased all of the goodwill the team built up in its three victories. ESPN.com claimed that Boston sent a message to Atlanta with the decisive win. People may have forgotten the three big home wins as they see the four huge road losses.
One thing that I fear for the future of the Hawks was that the owners would feel this was a sign of things turning around. Maybe the Hawks had reached and turned that proverbial corner. WAKE UP CALL! They have NOT. The Hawks were considered by most to be the worst playoff team in sports history. Yeah. ALL SPORTS! They were a sub-.500 team that reached the playoffs thanks to a weak conference. There were several teams in the west that were denied spots with better records. But the Hawks made the playoffs and won three games and they MAY have saved Mike Woodson’s job in the process. This feels similar to what happened with Dennis Felton at the University of Georgia. A great run at the end of the season when the bosses were really looking at the performance saved Felton’s job. Now the Spirit Group could be inclined to keep Woody around.
The Spirit Group has a little experience with this. Last season the Thrashers FINALLY reached the playoffs before getting embarrassed by playing just four games before leaving the Stanley Cup playoffs. But the goodwill of making the playoffs was enough to keep Bob Hartley around as well as Don Waddell. The team floundered this season and Hartley was axed and Waddell may not be far behind. The question is though, would the owners have preferred NOT to make the playoffs last year so the rebuilding effort would be entering year two instead of year one this off-season? The Hawks may have given the owners hope and they may try to build onto this sandcastle while the tide is slowly coming in. Don’t panic and give Bibby an extension just yet. For as good as he looked at home, in Boston he looked old against Rondo. Josh Smith is a talent, but is he MAX-MONEY talent?
Too many times a team comes together for a small moment and continue mediocrity when it should just let the bottom fall out so a rebuilding effort can begin. The Baltimore Orioles did it a few years back and only NOW have they decided to gut and rebuild the team. The Thrashers are going through it right now. (SELL OFF THE ASSETS, DONNY!) The Knicks did it when Isiah Thomas came on board when they traded for Eddy Curry and Stephon Marbury and now the team is in Cap-purgatory.
Bottom line, the three home wins represented a battle victory. But please don’t let a battle win lead to an overall war loss. Sometimes it is better to call a spade “a spade,” and start over. The Hawks need to do just that.
Alas, it was not to be. And the worst part about getting crushed in game seven: the Hawks are right back to where everyone thought they were entering the playoffs. Yahoo.com ran a headline “See how bad the Celtics beat Atlanta in Game 7.” ABC’s Jeff Van Gundy said that this blowout loss erased all of the goodwill the team built up in its three victories. ESPN.com claimed that Boston sent a message to Atlanta with the decisive win. People may have forgotten the three big home wins as they see the four huge road losses.
One thing that I fear for the future of the Hawks was that the owners would feel this was a sign of things turning around. Maybe the Hawks had reached and turned that proverbial corner. WAKE UP CALL! They have NOT. The Hawks were considered by most to be the worst playoff team in sports history. Yeah. ALL SPORTS! They were a sub-.500 team that reached the playoffs thanks to a weak conference. There were several teams in the west that were denied spots with better records. But the Hawks made the playoffs and won three games and they MAY have saved Mike Woodson’s job in the process. This feels similar to what happened with Dennis Felton at the University of Georgia. A great run at the end of the season when the bosses were really looking at the performance saved Felton’s job. Now the Spirit Group could be inclined to keep Woody around.
The Spirit Group has a little experience with this. Last season the Thrashers FINALLY reached the playoffs before getting embarrassed by playing just four games before leaving the Stanley Cup playoffs. But the goodwill of making the playoffs was enough to keep Bob Hartley around as well as Don Waddell. The team floundered this season and Hartley was axed and Waddell may not be far behind. The question is though, would the owners have preferred NOT to make the playoffs last year so the rebuilding effort would be entering year two instead of year one this off-season? The Hawks may have given the owners hope and they may try to build onto this sandcastle while the tide is slowly coming in. Don’t panic and give Bibby an extension just yet. For as good as he looked at home, in Boston he looked old against Rondo. Josh Smith is a talent, but is he MAX-MONEY talent?
Too many times a team comes together for a small moment and continue mediocrity when it should just let the bottom fall out so a rebuilding effort can begin. The Baltimore Orioles did it a few years back and only NOW have they decided to gut and rebuild the team. The Thrashers are going through it right now. (SELL OFF THE ASSETS, DONNY!) The Knicks did it when Isiah Thomas came on board when they traded for Eddy Curry and Stephon Marbury and now the team is in Cap-purgatory.
Bottom line, the three home wins represented a battle victory. But please don’t let a battle win lead to an overall war loss. Sometimes it is better to call a spade “a spade,” and start over. The Hawks need to do just that.
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