Fletcher's Rat Pack, Version 3.0

Anyone who knows me know I dig the Rat Pack. Frank, Dean, Sammy, Joey, Peter. All of those cats. Loved the music, the movies, everything. Those guys were icons and the fact that they banded together and made for such cool posters and inspired movies like Swingers and Reservoir Dogs is even better. The Original Ocean's 11 was really good and the ending was sweet. Love those twist endings. I also believe that the original Rat Pack inspired groups of actors to realize that it is OK to be in each other's movies. Sometimes it is alright to take less money if you are enjoying doing something and that has made numerous movies far more watchable over the years. Pitt, Damon and Clooney. Pacino and DiNero. The guys from Kevin Smith's movies, Ferrell, Wilson Bros and Vaughn with Stiller in there too. Apatow and Rogan. It allows you to KNOW that the movie will be good because you KNOW the actors ALREADY have a chemistry together.

Well a few years back 2004, I decided to bust out the first ever Fletcher Rat Pack. Not that I was friends with these people, but they seem like the kind of guys that I'd want to hang with. They could be in my entourage, if you will. The first Rat Pack was Heath Ledger (pretty good in Patriot and Knight's Tale), Vin Diesel (hot from XXX) and Brad Pitt (fight club, et al.) Those guys were rock stars in my mind, until Diesel's fall from grace with such movies as The Pacifier. Then Brad Pitt left Jen for Angelina...OUT!
I needed the Rat Pack version 2.0 and I decided to keep Heath but I added Wentwork Miller (loved him in Prisonbreak. Those eyes are Cal Ripken-like) and Jim from the Office. NOT John Kransnicky or whatever his name is, but JIM. I liked that Jim said, ENOUGH OF YOU PAM! I AM GOING WITH KAREN! But then I watched Season2's special features of PB and season3's and realized that Wentworth is a bit of a tool. Badass in the show, but a bit of a tool in real life. AND he decided to be a GAP model. GONE! And Jim decided to get back with Pam, a girl that dumped him TWICE! And Heath died, so a new Rat Pack was needed.....
Oh, the options. The line was out the door of candidates lining up to be involved with Sportsbyfletch's Rat Pack. Folks were beating down the door. It was crazy. Well the SBF editors managed to sort through all of the resumes and decided on three individuals.
Before we meet who made the cut, let's take a look at the near misses....
Seth Cohen/Adam Brody. I like the sarcasm, but ultimately decided that Seth has gone too cold since THE OC ended. Where has Adam Brody gone? Is he hiding somewhere?

E!'s The Soup host Joel McHale. This guy is freaking funny. Love his bits, love the dog, spaghetti cat...I think I could do The Soup, but I couldn't do it as well as he can. He is 10X funnier than I could even dream of being. And for that (pure jealousy) is why he isn't in Rat Pack 3.0

Ryan Atwood-Chino Style. Ben McKenzie is making a comeback with SouthLAnd in just a few weeks (VERY excited about that btw), but I cannot put Ben in there-too short. I would ONLY consider including Atwood if it was the Chino version. After he moved to The OC, he got too soft IMO. I liked the combative Atwood, not the marshmellow-neutered Atwood that he became with Lindsey and Marissa. I think they took the boy out of Chino AND the Chino out of the boy....that's a shame.

Michael Cera. I love his style of humor from Arrested Development and Superbad. The self-deprecating humor that MADE Superbad but was overshadowed by Jonah Hill's penis jokes. That's a shame. He is only appreciated by people with a real sense of humor. But he is funnier than I am, so he is OUT! (I am shallow)

Matt Damon. The guy is JASON BOURNE. Need I say more? But then I remember he is in the Film Actors Guild. Can't have that. Matt Damon! I loved his character in Ocean's 11, but he was a little too anti-Semitic for my tastes in School Ties. Dude, you are a fullback, just block. Do your job for the team and enjoy the victory. Golly!

Casey Affleck. Loved him in Gone Baby Gone, and in Ocean's 11, but I am having a hard time with his part in the JPhoenix prank. Plus I believe he gave Burger King the idea to call the Whooper a "Whooper sandwich." IT IS A FREAKING HAMBURGER BURGER KING! NOT A SANDWICH! YOU ARE BURGER KING, NOT SANDWICH KING! QUIT TRYING TO TRICK THE AMERICAN PUBLIC INTO THINKING YOU ARE SUDDENLY HEALTHY! And for this, Casey is OUT!

Brian McCann, aka Lumpy aka Heaps. My favorite Braves player. 3 full seasons in the bigs, 3 all-star teams. he is clutch at the plate. best young catcher in the game (YES I AM INCLUDING JOE MAUER IN THIS STATEMENT). Really the only reason to go see the Braves last year. Should be an all-star for many many more years. Got his nickname Heaps because apparently he eats heaps of cheesefries. I can't have someone stealing all of my fries! He's out!

Dr. Greg House. He is a smart ass but a genius at the same time. Back in the day if would have been nice to have his British accent to pick up girls, but I am married now and his bald spot drives away the ladies anyways. The only bad part would be if I wanted to play some sporting activity with my Rat Pack. He couldn't do it.

Tim Tebow. The pluses, he is dominating Survivor:Cuba. His tears can cure cancer. He has a heisman. He can do circumcisions. the cons, he is a Florida Gator, he has a lisp, and he is a Florida Gator. Out.

Anthony Kim. This golfer is the next big thing on the PGA tour. I'd love to see AK and Paddy Harrington staring each other down. This guy made Sergio crap his pants in the Ryder Cup and the only other person I've ever seen do that is Tiger Woods. Anthony is only the second golfer EVER to win two tourneys in a year before the age of 25. But he doesn't have any major titles yet, and as a THREE-TIME DFBGC winner, the Rat Pack already has a golfer.

James Blake. The tennis star is always on People's Sexiest athlete list. But he cut the dreds and he's never won a Grand Slam event. He is the male version of Anna Kournakova. I am just as handsome and I too have never won a Grand Slam event. He's out.

Taylor Townsend. Yep, that's right. I ALMOST invited a girl to be in the Rat Pack. (Hey, it is 2009. I figured a woman could be involved) She single-handedly carried The OC's season 4, made it watchable while overcoming Chris Brown, Willa Holland's Marissa impression, and Summer's heel turn. But she couldn't get the show extended a full season, and for that, she falls just short.

Jay from The City. The Aussie singer's band was actually pretty good, those few times they showed him. PLUS I LOVE how Australians speak. Well, actually I just like Outback cheesefries, but you get the point. Jay came up short though because I don't think he has staying power AND did he really cry to try and get Whitney back then she didn't take him back? COME ON JAY. YOU LET GUYS DOWN!

David Cook. The American Idol was everything Chris Daughtry tried to be and was ACTUALLY a rocker. True Daughtry has had more success since the show ended, but Cook's Light On song is pretty good. AND Cook WON. But I want Cook to release the stuff he did while on the show. Hello, Elenor Rigby, Always be my Baby. Can he do that? release those and maybe we'll talk about 4.0

Kyle Chandler. Not only does he impart wisdom as Coach Taylor on FNL, but his stint on Grey's Anatomy made that Code:Black episode the best TV of the year. He always seems to know what to say to make you feel better and his relationship with his wife and daughter is how i want to be when I have kids. He can be funny, serious, sad, everything. AND he went to Georgia. But he might be just a touch too old for the Rat Pack.

WHO MADE THE CUT?
Pacey from Pacey's Creek. It was really called Dawson's Creek, but it was PACEY that carried it and even took the main character's girl at the end. He took her V-Card over Dawson and then got her at the end. Why did Joey keep going to Pacey? Because Dawson was a D-bag and Joey (despite being a d-bag herself), realized that Pacey was the true hero of the show. Pacey was NOT the loser his family thought he was. He was a winner. He just needed some motivation in the classroom. He was a kickbutt chef, a sailor, a great stockbroker (except when he lost DCreek's money, but that was just a bump and the fact that Pacey cared so much is what did him in there.) and quite the LOVAH! Just ask the ladies. He bagged a teacher, Dr. Cameron, Joey, Audrey, his coworker waitress, his boss...the guy could close ANY deal. And you KNOW he'd have your back in a fight.

Justin Timberlake. Do you even remember that he was in N*Sync? The guy can act, be funny, sing, play guitar, piano, dance, host Victoria's Secret Fashion shows, the ESPYs...he can do it ALL. You put him on your song, BOOM, it's on the radio. Sexyback might end up as the SONG OF THE DECADE. The guy is a triple threat that could OWN Broadway if he wanted to...or movies if he wanted to...or music...you get the idea. He is FRP3's Dean Martin.

finally, the first pick I made and got a BROner about...Tim Riggins. Dude is a badass. He gets the girls, wins the fights, makes plays on the football field and has become the best character on the show. PLUS the actor who plays him is from Canada, which is PROBABLY why Riggins is so funny. I don't believe Riggins has ever been turned down (Lyla came back to him. She did!) and he bagged his Cougar neighbor. He was great with Bo and he helped his Brother even when it meant breaking the law, so you know he is loyal. Did he sleep with his crippled best friend's girl, but he also gave her up (after she came on to HIM!) because he knew it was wrong. When his teammates beat him up, he still delivered a crushing block to spring Smash and win the game, DESPITE a separated shoulder. Riggins owns that school and good for him, getting Lyla as well as a scholarship to play at the next level. If I was ever in trouble, you know Riggins would be there with a six pack to help me through my tough time. I don't think I am cool enough to hang with Riggins, but I'd certainly try to if I lived in Dillon. He's one bad@ss motherfu--HUSH YOUR MOUTH! Just talking about Riggins.